In this article, you’ll find five strategies to proactively build a strong relationship with students and prevent outbursts, along with three ways to de-escalate students in the moment.

Working with students with behavioral issues in the general education classroom

Amir* is a ninth-grade student with a history of trauma and a diagnosed behavioral disorder. The notes from his previous school say that he has a history of cursing at teachers, storming out of class, and getting into fights with other students.

How would the way you interact with Amir be different if the first thing I told you about him were that he was highly intelligent, that his reading skills were more than two years above grade level, that he was charismatic, and wanted to be a professional musician?

For students with emotional and behavioral disorders (EBD), their record of misbehavior precedes them everywhere they go. They can never get a fresh start. They feel constantly judged on the basis of their worst moments.

Emotional and behavioral disorders are a broad category of disabilities, which include depression, anxiety, oppositional defiant disorder, and conduct disorder.

Just like a student with dyslexia cannot simply “try harder” at reading, students with EBD can’t just “try harder” at exhibiting appropriate behavior. Their disability presents them with unique challenges, and they need to learn how to manage their disability.

Many general education teachers struggle with accommodating students with EBD, and worry that students like Amir will disrupt their class and interfere with other students’ learning. Or they feel they don’t have time or it would be unfair to treat Amir differently. And many teachers feel afraid that a student like Amir could exhibit violence during an outburst, worrying for their own safety and their students’ safety.

In the event that a student with EBD is putting themselves or others in danger, you will need to follow your school’s guidelines for use of physical restraint and protocols for keeping other students safe.

However, the most effective thing you can do is to learn how to avoid and de-escalate conflict with students with EBD so that such a situation never comes up.

Pro-active approaches to supporting students with EBD

Here are five proactive strategies for supporting students with behavioral disabilities, and avoiding conflicts in the first place:

1. Set goals together

Get the student involved and invested in working on their classroom behavior. Hear from them what they think they struggle with, and what they are most motivated to work on. You can also share your priorities. Keep in mind that while you may want to address more serious infractions first, the student’s goal should be attainable so that they can feel successful. You may need to compromise and start with some lower hanging fruit.

Together, decide what skills they will work on and what criteria you have for success. Set those based on where the student is at now — not where you expect all students should be. If they are interrupting class 10 times each hour, you can set an attainable goal at no more than 5 times, even if you expect other students to never call out.

Aim for progress, not perfection.

A note on fairness: sometimes we get caught up worrying that it is unfair to the rest of the class if we don’t hold every student to the same expectations. Students with disabilities — including emotional and behavioral disabilities — may not always be able to meet the same expectations, or may need accommodations to do so. Second, if one student’s behavior is affecting others in the class, it would be more unfair to the class not to use the best tools we have available to help students who are disruptive succeed.

2. Offer previews

For students with anxiety, a history of trauma, or who struggle at school, not knowing what is coming next can be a significant source of stress. Deviations from the routine can throw them off balance. To help them feel more calm and in control, you can preview the daily schedule or upcoming activities with them. Provide them with a written or picture schedule and walk through it with them. On a normal day, this might sound like “Good morning, Jamal! Here is the bell ringer for today. When it’s done, we’ll go over the homework from last night and then work on fractions with our math partners.”

Give them a chance to ask questions or raise concerns, and note how they respond. If it seems like they’re having a rough time, maybe today is not the day to cold call on them.

You should also plan to preview anything that may be difficult for them and help them strategize on how they’ll handle it. For example, if they have a hard time working with peers, ask “What can you try if you feel frustrated working with your partner?” and brainstorm some solutions together. Don’t forget to let them know if there is a change to the routine. “Remember, Eddie isn’t here today, so you’ll be working with Anayah for math.”

Transitions are often really hard for students with EBD — give lots of reminders before the transition happens. If needed, consider letting them transition early or give them extra time to move between activities.

What are your secret rules for how everyone else should behave?

3. Allow for student choice

Students with EBD need opportunities to feel in control. If you have a student who is defiant, provide them as many opportunities as possible to make choices and have some level of control over their experience. These choices can be big or small, and you can still ask the student to meet the same learning objectives. Some examples of daily classroom choices could include:

• Writing down the answers to questions or telling them to you orally
• Working alone or with a partner
• Choosing which question to answer first
• Which location they work in

When giving them a choice, provide 2-4 options they can choose from. Make sure that you really are ok with them choosing any of those options. If you let them choose to sit in the back of the classroom but have to move them two minutes later because they’re talking to a friend, they may not feel their choice was honored. Make sure they can be successful with any of the options they choose.

4. Provide structured breaks

Give students with EBD breaks — and teach them how to use them. Breaks shouldn’t just be something they earn — otherwise, they may never earn one. Their behavior will get worse and worse the longer they don’t have an opportunity to release steam. When the student is calm and regulated, talk about how breaks can help us focus. Help them schedule and take short, structured breaks. Some students may need to stretch or walk for a few minutes, others may need a short time to zone out, draw, or listen to music. Keep breaks short and frequent, and use a timer to monitor how long they have left. 

5. Praise and affirm

Students with emotional and behavioral disabilities often have lower confidence and self-esteem. They may spend much of their time in school feeling like a failure. They (and their parents) are likely told what they are doing wrong every day.

Timely, specific praise is a wonderful tool for reinforcing good behavior for all students and can be especially powerful for students who hear it so rarely. For students with EBD, try to “catch them” in good behavior as often as possible. Each student may have different preferences about public or private praise, so check in with them first. A simple “I see Shaniya has finished her exit ticket and turned it in” or “Thank you for completing question two” lets the student know that their efforts aren’t in vain.

Make sure to include parents as well. Try to call or write home as often about successes or good days as you do about bad days.

When you can’t get through to “that kid,” try these 3 coaching models to guide difficult conversations

De-escalation strategies for students with EBD

Even when you have put lots of proactive strategies in place, there will still be times when students misbehave or start to get agitated. The goal of de-escalation is to prevent a larger outburst.

This is not the time to teach, reinforce, or punish. When stress levels get high, the rational parts of our brain shut down, and the parts of our brain responsible for the fight, flight, or freeze response take over.

The stress cycle needs to resolve, and the student needs to be back in a state of calm before learning can continue.

1. Remove or reduce contact with the trigger

If you can identify what triggered the response, try to help the student take space from what is upsetting them. If it is comments or looks from another student, try to give them space to leave the room. If it is an academic task, see if you can give them a break or something else to work on. If something you said seems to have upset them, you may need another teacher or administrator to take them on a short walk.

Remember, the goal long term is for the student to develop coping strategies to deal with difficult situations, like peer relationships. But in the moment, reducing tension and preventing an outburst comes first.

2. Listen without judgment

Listen to the student’s feelings and concerns — without trying to give suggestions or problem-solve. If they seem amenable, try to reflect back on what you hear without judgment. Don’t try to argue with them over what did or did not happen, or how they should feel. Let them know that their feelings are valid. Taking a step back and getting to vent can help them work through their emotions.

3. Model calm

Don’t match their energy. If they are yelling or becoming agitated, keep your voice even and low, and slow down. You may need to take (many) deep breaths to keep yourself calm. At all costs, avoid getting into a power struggle. When a student is refusing to do what you ask and is becoming more and more upset, it is not the time to try to make them.

Avoid threats of punishment or loss of privileges based on their behavior — those are more likely to escalate them further in the heat of the moment. This doesn’t have to mean that their behavior shouldn’t have consequences — but telling them those consequences when they are upset will not motivate them to change their behavior.

By responding calmly, you can decrease the likelihood of their behavior escalating to an unsafe level. When they are calm again, you can reflect together on what happened, discuss logical consequences, and make a plan for how to handle similar situations in the future.

The Swiss Cheese Model: Letting go of “all or nothing” thinking

Conclusion

Amir struggled with work refusal, disrupting class, shouting at teachers, and getting into fights with other students for months. His behavior and attitude didn’t even begin to improve until December. Because of his struggles with impulsiveness and defiance, he was used to teachers giving up on him, underestimating him, and criticizing him constantly.

As he began to understand that his opinions and choices would be listened to and that his effort and successes were appreciated, he grew more willing to cooperate. He learned how to ask for breaks when he needed them, and began asking for help with academic assignments. I felt proud that, by using the above strategies, I could be a small part of his journey.

Let me know which strategies you plan to implement in your classroom!

*Amir is a composite of multiple students I have worked with. Names and identifying details were changed for privacy.

The post How to de-escalate students with EBD or other behavioral disabilities appeared first on Truth For Teachers.

On February 24, 2022, Florida’s House of Representatives passed HB 1557. It prohibits instruction about sexuality or gender from grades K-3, and any instruction on LGBTQ issues “in a manner that is not age-appropriate or developmentally appropriate for students.”

The bill does not provide any further guidance on what is and is not developmentally appropriate for 4th-12th graders, leaving it up to districts and schools to interpret, and leaving open the possibility for parents to sue for any instruction that they feel doesn’t adhere to the law.

Many organizations committed to the safety and wellbeing of LGBTQ students have outlined that students need to feel safe at school and see themselves reflected in the curriculum in order to develop a positive self-perception.

So for many teachers, especially of younger grades, the question remains — what does it look like to teach about the LGBTQ community in an age-appropriate way? And how do we find the time within already packed curriculum maps to devote to these lessons?

Below, I’m sharing two ways to think about incorporating LGBTQ education into the classroom: by age and by subject area.

Big ideas to incorporate in your teaching

Grades K – 3

For those who wonder why we should be incorporating LGBTQ education in early elementary school, there is often an underlying belief that teaching about the LGBTQ community means talking about sex or letting children “choose” their gender.

Teaching kids at these ages about people who are LGBTQ is really about accepting others who are different, acknowledging the diversity of family structures, and treating others with kindness.

Between kindergarten and grade 3, children should learn:

• There is no one “right” way to be a boy or a girl.

Teachers have to deal with this every day. When one child wants to exclude a classmate from a game of soccer because “sports are for boys,” we have an opportunity to name and model for them that girls can like to play sports too.

There are lots of wonderful children’s books about being different or not doing traditional “boy” or “girl” things. I recommend Julián is a Mermaid and Red: A Crayon’s Story 

• Families come in all shapes and sizes.

When talking about families or reading books with the class, feature a diverse range of families. Just as many teachers are already including books with single-parent families, adoptive families, and blended families, children of LGBTQ parents should have a chance to see families that look like theirs acknowledged and represented. Best Best Colors is a wonderful book for this.

Grades 4 – 5 

At this age, students in your school are learning about the contributions of other groups — women, people of color, people with disabilities. This is an indication it’s time to start teaching about the contributions of the LGBTQ community. Students at this age should know:

• No one should be treated unfairly because they are different. 

Teaching kids to treat others kindly, not to bully, and to celebrate people who are different is not a new lesson for classrooms. With the increased emphasis on SEL in many places, there are lots of great opportunities to talk about accepting others who are different. Fourth and fifth grade is also a good time to talk about how people are sometimes treated unfairly in the world because of who they are. A good book recommendation is My Mixed-Up Berry Blue Summer

• LGBTQ people existed in the past and made many positive contributions to the world.

Just like students of different backgrounds deserve to see positive representations of their experiences or culture in the curriculum, kids who may be starting to become aware of their own LGBTQ identities or with LGBTQ family members should also see how people like them have made an impact on the world. Try the book Leaders Like Us: Bayard Rustin

• There is more than one way to become a parent.

Depending on when your school introduces anatomy and biology, you may not need to go into detail about the science behind it. (If you are introducing concepts like puberty, menstruation, conception, and pregnancy, you should include ways people become pregnant besides sex, such as insemination and IVF).

Otherwise, fourth and fifth graders should know about adoption, foster families, single-parent families, and blended families. This can be incorporated organically in literature units or through family tree projects. A good read-aloud is And That’s Why She’s My Mama.

How to incorporate LGBTQ+ inclusivity in subject-area curriculum

In addition to addressing LGBTQ issues in age-appropriate ways through SEL and literature, LGBTQ education can be incorporated into almost every content area.

Florida Governor DeSantis voiced his support for HB 1557 by expressing concern that LGBTQ education isn’t a good use of schools’ time. Instead, he said, “schools need to be teaching kids to read, to write. They need to teach them science, history. We need more civics.”

So below, I share ways that LGBTQ education can be incorporated into literacy, science, history, and civics.

English Language Arts

Incorporating LGBTQ education through reading and writing is as simple as providing a diversity of books and characters in read-alouds and classroom libraries, and being open to answering student questions honestly and with humility.

When students ask questions that you don’t know how to answer or make you feel uncomfortable, it’s okay to say, “I don’t know” or “I’ll try to find out and get back to you.”

Other school professionals like social workers and counselors may be able to provide additional information and support for you and your students.

There are also many guides from organizations such as Teaching Tolerance, GLSEN, and the Human Rights Campaign. Here are some resources and book lists for finding books for all ages with LGBTQ themes:

• Stonewall Book Awards List
• Hope in a Box
• We Are Teachers: 30 Books with LGBTQ Characters
• OurShelves

History and Social Studies

LGBTQ people have had an impact on American history and world history, and like other marginalized groups, their identities, whether private of public, contributed to their outlook and impact.

For example, when teaching about the Civil Rights movement, consider also highlighting how it helped spark other equal rights movements, including LGBTQ rights and disability rights. Activists such as Bayard Rustin fought for civil rights for African Americans, and applied similar strategies to advance the rights of other marginalized groups.

Below are a wealth of other resources for learning and teaching about LGBTQ history:

• Timeline of LGBTQ Rights in American History
• GLSEN Guide to LGBTQ History
• Making Gay History Podcast
• The Legacy Project
• Smithsonian National Museum of American History
• Pride: The Story of Harvey Milk and the Rainbow Flag (book recommendation

STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Math)

Many schools are already actively working to rectify inequalities in STEM, particularly the gender gap. There are lots of amazing school programs like Girls Who Code that are ensuring that girls see themselves represented in STEM fields and that they can imagine a future for themselves in the sciences. We also know how important it is for non-White students to see examples of scientists, mathematicians, and inventors who look like them.

Highlighting the achievements of LGBTQ individuals in the sciences can be just as simple. For example, an early elementary school lesson on codes and codebreaking could include a station about the Navajo Code Talkers and Alan Turing. Turing is often considered one of the fathers of computer science and invented one of the first computers. He helped the Allies to win World War II by deciphering encoded messages from the Germans. For younger students, it may appropriate to mention that he was gay. For older students, you may include a paragraph about how he experienced discrimination for being gay in 1952, and that after he died the government later apologized and honored him for his contributions.

Other notable LGBTQ scientists include lesbian Sally Ride, who is already often celebrated in elementary schools as the first American astronaut in space. Alan Hart, a transgender doctor, pioneered the use of X-rays beyond broken bones to help identify other conditions such as tuberculosis.

Here are some resources to help:

• This article from Science News for Students, “Proud to be Different in STEM,” describes the various types of discrimination that some face when entering science fields (based on race, gender, and sexual orientation), how they overcame those obstacles, and what they research and how it helps people.
• The 500 Queer Scientists project is an amazing resource for stories of contemporary queer scientists. They even have a searchable database that allows you to sort through over 60 scientific fields and filter by location, if you’re looking for someone who might be able to come visit your classroom for a career day or science demonstration.
• Sally Ride: A Photobiography of America’s Pioneering Woman in Space (book recommendation)

Using inquiry to help kids develop critical consciousness

The post What is age-appropriate LGBTQ+ education? appeared first on Truth For Teachers.

Warren Buffett once offered his personal pilot, Mike Flint, some time to discuss his career and goals for the future.

Buffet advised Flint to think of 25 things he would like to accomplish in the near future. Then, Buffett asked him to circle his top 5 goals on that list.

He then asked Flint what he was going to do about the other 20 goals that weren’t circled. Flint responded, “They are still important so I’ll work on those intermittently as I see fit as I’m getting through my top five. They are not as urgent but I still plan to give them dedicated effort.”

Buffett gave a surprising response: “These other 20 goals are your main distractions. Avoid them at all costs.”

In the productivity world, Buffet’s advice is known as the 25/5 rule. This rule teaches us that the things that distract us most aren’t things that waste our time.

Rather, the tasks that are most likely to distract us are the ones that would help us accomplish a peripheral goal, but don’t move us towards our top priorities.

As teachers, we have so many different goals and priorities, goals that we would like to achieve, initiatives that we are asked to take on, policy changes that we need to implement. It can feel overwhelming to look at all the things that we could do to help students learn, or even all the things that we need to do, and realize that there just isn’t enough time in a day or week or year to do it all. If we try to do it all anyway, our attention will be pulled in too many different directions to do any of it well.

This is where the To-Don’t List comes in. Since we can’t do it all, we need to make sure that we intentionally choose which tasks we will absolutely complete – and which will never get done.

What is a To-Don’t List?

A written “To-Don’t” List is exactly the same as a written To-Do List: it is a plan and a commitment for how you are going to spend your time and energy for the day or week.

It outlines the tasks and activities that are a distraction hazard.

By reviewing your “To Don’t” List regularly, you can make sure that you aren’t wasting your time on tasks that aren’t taking you in the right direction.

How to write a To-Don’t List

Method #1 – The Time Wasters

For those who find themselves easily distracted during valuable time blocks, especially with mindless activities like scrolling through Instagram, tidying, and easy grading, a To-Don’t List can be a list of activities that you are not going to partake in until after your other goals have been completed or until you leave school.

These kinds of tasks that don’t require a lot of brainpower often creep into our day because we aren’t taking real breaks that replenish us. If you find yourself reaching for your phone often to distract you, try out a two-column To-Do and To-Don’t List, and make sure you add some soul-nourishing activities to your To-Do List.

Method #2 – Not Today!

If you have trouble letting go of your lower priority tasks, put them on a list “To Do, But Not Today.”

I love this style of To-Don’t list when my classroom feels messy, I’m a week behind on grading, and I have important deadlines coming up. I know that when I need to sit down and get focused work done, I might be tempted to knock out the smaller, easier tasks that feel so urgent!

Rather than saying that I will never do them, I tell myself that maybe I’ll get to them eventually, but I am absolutely not allowed to work on them today.

The “To Do, But Not Today” list reduces my anxiety because it allows me to log and acknowledge the tasks that are on my mind. I know that I can come back to them any day if I still want to.

Sometimes, when I come back to the tasks on my “To Do, But Not Today” list, the tasks don’t seem so urgent anymore. Once you can recognize that (and work up the courage), you can put them on a “Never Gonna Happen” list.

A “Not Today” list I jotted in school one day. These were all things that were on my mind, but not as important as the IEP draft I had to write by the end of the week.

Method #3 – May Do, Must Do

“May Do, Must Do” lists aren’t just for students! They help me make time for fun activities (or lower priority tasks) while keeping my focus on the items with a deadline.

I especially love to make these lists on Sundays or other days off school when I have so much I could get done, and the thought of an entirely open day makes me want to do all the things. Based on the amount of time I have and my priorities, I’ll list 3-5 things that I Must Do, and put everything else (including fun things) on the May Do List.

If I finish my Must Do’s, I can choose whatever I want off the May Do list to work on, but I count my day a success if all the Must Do’s are completed. I try not to allow myself to feel guilty for not getting something on the May Do List done because after all, I chose not to prioritize it.

A May Do, Must Do list for a Sunday. My May Do list has options of work tasks as well as things I could do for fun.

Method #4 – The Long Term Goals

Long term goals are the intended use of the 25/5 rule – and the hardest and most powerful way to implement it.

Think about all the things that you would like to achieve in the next year, or the next 3 years. Then, be ruthless and choose only the top 5 things that you will actually shoot for.

Refer back to that list often when you are thinking about what to work on or what new commitments you are going to take on.

When your principal asks you to join a new committee or sell your prep period, go back to your list and see if that choice aligns with your top 5 goals. If it’s not something that is immediately going to advance you towards that goal, say no to it, so that you can say yes to the things that will move the needle.

An example of Top 5, long-term goals. If your focus is on working less and improving the English curriculum, you should say no when asked to help align the math lessons to the new standards.

Yes, you need to write it down!

You should write out your To-Don’t List – digitally or on paper – for the same reasons you keep a written To-Do List.

First, so you don’t forget something on it, and second, because the act of writing them down makes you more committed. Finally, writing them down can help relieve anxiety for some people. It also provides some accountability if you look back at it after a block of work time and make sure that you spent your time the way you intended.

No matter how you are structuring your “To-Do” and “To-Don’t” lists, planning ahead and aligning your day-to-day activities with your long-term goals is a powerful way to make continual progress towards whatever priorities you care about most.

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