{"id":149829,"date":"2023-03-29T12:00:16","date_gmt":"2023-03-29T17:00:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/truthforteachers.com\/?p=149829"},"modified":"2023-03-28T19:06:10","modified_gmt":"2023-03-29T00:06:10","slug":"how-teachers-can-channel-their-anger-productively","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/truthforteachers.com\/how-teachers-can-channel-their-anger-productively\/","title":{"rendered":"Teachers are angry. Here’s how to channel that anger productively."},"content":{"rendered":"

In 2019, Angela Watson hosted an incredible podcast episode<\/a> with Soraya Chemaly, author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women\u2019s Anger<\/a>. I read this book in slow bits as the pandemic unfolded, finishing it in July 2020. It has become a familiar touchstone as I navigate all that I\u2019ve been angry about these past few years.<\/h2>\n

Chemaly writes that \u201cAnger is a boundary.\u201d In the 2020-21 school year, and even more so, the 2021-22 school year, anger alerted me to where my boundaries were being crossed.<\/p>\n

I pitched the idea for this article to Angela in the spring, when the anger was still palpable for me. I had a theory that perhaps other teachers felt the same, quite a few metaphorically saying, \u201ctake this job and shove it.\u201d<\/a> (Angela wrote posts here<\/a> and here<\/a> to help guide teachers making this decision). I had a hunch that I was not the only one who was fed up.<\/p>\n

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This theory \u2014 that teachers are more angry than usual \u2014\u00a0requires some contextualizing, though. Was it just me? Was it just because I read the book and let myself feel that anger?<\/p>\n

By the time this is published, we will be at a new moment in society. I may process anger differently from when I first pitched this article, but anger will still be a part of me \u2014 a part of all of us \u2014 because it is part of the human experience. Chemaly calls us to learn from our anger, to have a plan to navigate this emotion whenever it floods our nervous systems.<\/p>\n

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Practice anger consciousness<\/h2>\n

Society as a whole looks negatively upon anger because it can lead to irreversible harm through impulsive actions and words, but Chemally argues that anger is neutral. It is what we do with anger that determines if there is harm.<\/p>\n

What Chemaly asks us to do first is to raise our \u201canger consciousness.\u201d This is our self-awareness that the emotion we are feeling is anger (women in particular may mislabel it as sad, frustrated, etc.). The physical manifestation of anger may vary widely as well, because of socialization. For example, someone may cry or laugh, but they are not sad or happy. They are angry. So much of the harm comes from people trying to get rid of the anger quickly before it\u2019s even fully understood.<\/p>\n

Making space to be anger-conscious may be extremely difficult at school. There are usually 35 pairs of eyes on you while you navigate your emotions. You may have an involuntary physical response (or be using all your resources to subdue that response). If you\u2019re not in class at the time, you may vacillate between \u201ckeeping it professional\u201d in front of administrators and \u201cjust venting\u201d with other teachers\u2013neither of which fully acknowledge the anger.<\/p>\n

We\u2019ll talk about what external actions to take, but right now, focus just on what anger feels like to you. Where do you feel it in your body? How are you likely to react? Think about it now, then take some time to practice just naming it in the moment.<\/p>\n

I spent months doing this after reading Rage Becomes Her<\/i>. Something would happen, and I would get this burning feeling from my cheeks to my stomach\u2013I\u2019m feeling it now as I write.<\/p>\n

I would feel that feeling, and to myself, I would say, \u201cAnger! There you are! I\u2019m really angry right now.\u201d<\/p>\n

When I had the space to reflect, I would even send a little thank-you to it. \u201cYou are a big emotion\u2013you clearly have an important message for me. Thank you so much.\u201d<\/p>\n

Interpret and act<\/h2>\n

Sometimes the cause of your anger may seem obvious; other times, not so much, but either way, try to pause for interpretation.<\/p>\n

Chemaly writes, \u201cAnger does not, in and of itself, \u2018make you right.\u2019\u201d Examine what you\u2019re angry about to figure out what\u2019s your work. Sometimes it\u2019s our thinking.<\/p>\n

There can certainly be irritants piling up every day that can lead to anger:<\/p>\n

    \n
  • The student who doesn\u2019t come to class until the last week of the quarter.<\/strong> If you’re thinking, \u201cThis kid doesn\u2019t care the whole time and now she wants me to bend over backwards?!\u201d you will likely feel anger in this situation. If you are thinking, \u201cOh wow, she\u2019s finally here. I\u2019m excited to get to know her. We will take this a day at a time,\u201d you probably aren\u2019t going to feel as angry. I know both are possible, because I\u2019ve seen the same student get radically different reactions across the school day, depending on the teacher, and that teacher\u2019s thoughts<\/i>. My question becomes, what kind of thoughts will lead to the actions that will create the best results for this student?<\/li>\n
  • The student who takes things from your desk without asking.<\/strong> Some people see this as a sign of the student\u2019s comfort; others as a boundary violation. If it feels like a boundary violation, it\u2019s important to communicate that calmly and clearly. Pretending that it isn\u2019t a boundary violation will only lead to more anger or an unintentional response. Treating it as a boundary violation when that boundary hasn\u2019t been communicated will also lead to anger.<\/li>\n
  • The student making passive-aggressive comments in class.<\/strong> This might be interpreted as a threat to the safety of the community you are building or a sign that this student is unsure of how to healthily relate to his classmates. Your interpretation will inform your next steps.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

    In any situation, it\u2019s important to explore all the ways something can be interpreted before acting so you can choose the best action for your situation.<\/p>\n

    And what about in the moment when you are angry? This is your opportunity to teach students what to do. A swift, clear response is what is needed in the case of a safety or boundary violation. Anything else can wait, but you can take a minute to regroup. Normalize this so students know how to do it. Here are some possible things to say, depending on your situation:<\/p>\n

      \n
    • \u201cLet\u2019s pause. I\u2019m going to grab a quick drink.\u201d<\/li>\n
    • \u201cI am going to take a few breaths and let\u2019s start again.\u201d<\/li>\n
    • \u201cPlease wait, I need to write something down real quick.\u201d You can jot down how you\u2019re feeling or anything you need to get out.<\/li>\n
    • If you have a preset dance party or brain break routine, this is also a good time to use that.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

      Before any of these actions, you may or may not choose to disclose that you are angry, depending on the situation, but if you want to highlight that you are navigating anger and not suppressing it, you can say, \u201cI think I\u2019m getting angry right now, I will need some time to think about it, but I\u2019m going to reset so I can focus on being your teacher.\u201d<\/p>\n

      Other times, it may be super clear that the anger is justified. Something like, \u201cI feel angry because it\u2019s important to me that\u2026and\u2026\u201d could be helpful.<\/p>\n

      I know this modeling might seem kind of cheesy, and not feel like what we want to do in the moment, but this is exactly what we need students to practice. They don\u2019t have to follow the road of anger wherever it leads. They can interrupt the moment and show themselves some care.<\/p>\n

      I worked with a student last year who engaged in physical fighting when she was angry. Through our consistent practice, she was able to stop fighting and find other ways to articulate her anger. I am so proud of her.<\/p>\n

      What about the adults?<\/h2>\n

      Even though I think it\u2019s totally okay to admit that sometimes we have class situations that make us angry, I imagine that the majority of the anger at school has to do with colleagues, administrators, and even forces and people outside the school.<\/p>\n

      Like in the situations above, after you\u2019ve identified the feeling as anger, it\u2019s time to interpret and act. There may be times when it\u2019s really how you\u2019re choosing to look at a situation that is causing your anger.<\/p>\n

      For example, is your colleague\u2019s email really implying something negative about you? Once I\u2019ve set aside my interpretation of a snarky-seeming email, my action is always to talk with the person face-to-face. This is the best way to clear the air and disrupt any inaccurate perceptions.<\/p>\n

      “Boundaries” have become a buzzword. Here’s how to actually create them as a teacher.<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n