{"id":152844,"date":"2025-06-29T12:00:11","date_gmt":"2025-06-29T17:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/truthforteachers.com\/?post_type=podcasts&#038;p=152844"},"modified":"2025-06-29T07:37:33","modified_gmt":"2025-06-29T11:37:33","slug":"following-your-inner-compass-when-you-cant-please-everyone","status":"publish","type":"podcasts","link":"https:\/\/truthforteachers.com\/truth-for-teachers-podcast\/following-your-inner-compass-when-you-cant-please-everyone\/","title":{"rendered":"The crumb story: following your inner compass when you can\u2019t please everyone"},"content":{"rendered":"<h3>I wanted to share a small story\u2014just a quiet moment at an airport breakfast counter\u2014that brought me back to the kind of person I want to be.<\/h3>\n<p>It\u2019s a simple action, one that no one asked for or expected. But it reminded me that our small choices matter\u2026 especially now.<\/p>\n<p>Because let\u2019s be honest: it\u2019s not always clear what the \u201cright\u201d choice is anymore.<\/p>\n<p>Social norms are shifting fast. Families have vastly different beliefs about what should be taught in school. Everyone\u2019s following their own path, and as educators, we\u2019re constantly navigating conflicting expectations. You can\u2019t make everyone happy. And trying to please every person or reflect every worldview just leaves you feeling pulled in a dozen directions.<\/p>\n<p>So, how do you decide how to show up\u2014when there\u2019s no one-size-fits-all answer?<\/p>\n<p>For me, it comes back to personal integrity. To <i>who I want to be<\/i>, even when there\u2019s no rulebook. This episode is an invitation to use this summer season to realign with your inner compass and reflect on what kind of world you want to help build\u2014starting with the small, almost invisible choices you make every day.<\/p>\n<p>We\u2019ll reflect on:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\">Why integrity and empathy are more important than ever in a divided world<\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\">How to center your actions around who you <i>want<\/i> to be (not who you\u2019re expected to be)<\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\">Questions to help you define your personal values and vision<\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\">Ways to leave things better than you found them, even in tiny, almost invisible ways<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>This isn\u2019t about perfection. It\u2019s about intention.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s about being the kind of person who shows up with clarity, even when no one\u2019s watching.<\/p>\n<p>And it\u2019s about using this summer to reconnect with the kind of world you want to help create.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-152998 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/truthforteachers.nyc3.cdn.digitaloceanspaces.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/The-crumb-story-tall-1-333x500.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"333\" height=\"500\" srcset=\"https:\/\/truthforteachers.nyc3.cdn.digitaloceanspaces.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/The-crumb-story-tall-1-333x500.jpg 333w, https:\/\/truthforteachers.nyc3.cdn.digitaloceanspaces.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/The-crumb-story-tall-1-683x1024.jpg 683w, https:\/\/truthforteachers.nyc3.cdn.digitaloceanspaces.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/The-crumb-story-tall-1-768x1152.jpg 768w, https:\/\/truthforteachers.nyc3.cdn.digitaloceanspaces.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/The-crumb-story-tall-1.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 333px) 100vw, 333px\" \/><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Listen to episode 328 below,<br \/>\n<\/strong><strong>or subscribe in your podcast app<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: none;\" title=\"Libsyn Player\" src=\"\/\/html5-player.libsyn.com\/embed\/episode\/id\/37087125\/height\/90\/theme\/custom\/thumbnail\/yes\/direction\/backward\/render-playlist\/no\/custom-color\/672c5b\/\" width=\"500\" height=\"90\" scrolling=\"no\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">\ufeff<\/span><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">\ufeff<\/span><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">\ufeff<\/span><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">\ufeff<\/span><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\"> <\/span><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\"> <\/span><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h5 style=\"text-align: center;\">Sponsored by <a href=\"https:\/\/educateandrejuvenate.com\/sp\/summer-2025-event\/?aff=121\">Educate and Rejuvenate<\/a><\/h5>\n<p>One of my favorite things to talk about is personal development among educators. Who we are impacts how we show up in the classroom, and what better time of year to focus on ourselves and deepening our understanding of what\u2019s important to us?<\/p>\n<p>The idea for this episode came to me recently when I was sitting in an airport terminal on my way to speak to a group of administrators about streamlining systems and creating a culture of work-life balance school-wide. I was eating breakfast at one of those counter-height tables by the gate. You know the kind\u2014high chairs bolted to the floor, tiny stretch of tabletop, just enough space for a coffee and a carry-on.<\/p>\n<p>When I finished eating, I noticed there were some crumbs left behind. Nothing major. Just the inevitable trail of flaky pastry and toast crumbs that follow any decent airport breakfast. I looked around. There was no napkin dispenser, no one rushing over to clean the space. And of course, someone <i>is<\/i> paid to wipe down the tables eventually. But I didn\u2019t move on and leave the mess for someone else.<\/p>\n<p>I grabbed a tissue from my bag, swiped the crumbs into my hand, and threw them away.<\/p>\n<p>Not because anyone was watching. Not because I felt guilty. Not because there was a punishment if I didn\u2019t. Not because I was trying to earn some imaginary gold star for being a good citizen.<\/p>\n<p>I wiped the counter because I <i>like being the kind of person who takes care.<\/i><\/p>\n<p>It was a sudden realization that hit me in that moment: that I had instinctively cleaned up after myself because that had become part of my personal identity. It hit me that I like being the kind of person who leaves things a little better than I found them.<\/p>\n<p>Obviously, wiping the crumbs off a table at the airport is not a huge deal, and you might even be wondering why I gave it a second thought.<\/p>\n<p>There are two reasons. One is that I\u2019m always analyzing my choices, behavior, and thoughts. I enjoy observing myself and others and learning more about our individual tendencies, preferences, and habits.<\/p>\n<p>And that ties directly to the second reason\u2013that knowing myself, honoring my needs, and developing a self of personal integrity are not things I learned until I was an adult.<\/p>\n<p>I mentioned in my personal podcast series I released in the summer of 2023 that I grew up in a fundamentalist religion, where right and wrong were defined for me in very clear, very structured ways. The rules didn\u2019t always make sense to me, and often conflicted with what I later understood to be my own moral compass and internal sense of right or wrong. Nevertheless, who was I to question things? My job was to do what it said, to do what I was told was right and avoid what I was told was wrong.<\/p>\n<p>There was a comfort in that clarity\u2014in some ways, life is easier knowing there was always a rule to follow, always a line to stay inside. Seeing issues through a black and white lens with no gray area is simpler.<\/p>\n<p>But the nuance, the paradox, the complexity and tension of \u201cboth\/and\u201d instead of \u201ceither\/or\u201d&#8230;there\u2019s a richness in that. It\u2019s not simpler, but it\u2019s deeper.<\/p>\n<p>And over the years, as I\u2019ve deconstructed my faith, I\u2019ve moved away from that black-and-white framework where the rules are clearly defined for me no matter how I feel about them. And that\u2019s left me to do the work of figuring out the deeper truths underneath the rote following of rules. Part of my work in healing and becoming the best version of myself is uncovering what still resonates and what feels aligned.<\/p>\n<p>So instead of asking \u201cWhat am I supposed to do?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I ask,<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cWho do I want to <i>be<\/i>?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cWhat kind of person am I becoming?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cWhat kind of world am I helping to create?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Those questions feel more meaningful to me now than a list of dos and don\u2019ts. They help me show up with integrity\u2014even when there\u2019s no roadmap, even when there\u2019s no consensus.<\/p>\n<p>And I wanted to share that with you, in case you\u2019re in a similar place in your life, and of course, in case you\u2019re finding the topic of morals and values is coming up more frequently in your work as an educator.<\/p>\n<p>Because we\u2019re living in a time when core values can feel fragmented or divisive, when basic manners have been discarded, and empathy and care become quickly politicized. Our students come from all kinds of religious backgrounds, belief systems, and family cultures. They carry different definitions of what\u2019s right and wrong, what\u2019s respectful or disrespectful, and what\u2019s \u201cnormal.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And we, as educators, are navigating that complex terrain every single day. You may have students in your classroom whose parents want you to teach them in diametrically opposed ways. The worldview that one parent demands you present to their could completely contradict what another parent wants you to present.<\/p>\n<p>So where do we turn when there\u2019s no clear rulebook to follow? When your decisions won\u2019t be universally understood or appreciated? When there\u2019s no single answer that\u2019s going to please everyone, or apply in every situation? How do we navigate the nuance?<\/p>\n<p>For me, increasingly, things come back to the type of person I want to be.<\/p>\n<p>Not the kind of person who follows every rule to the letter without question.<br \/>\nNot the kind who shrinks herself to avoid discomfort or hard conversations.<br \/>\nNot even the kind of person who always gets it right and can keep everyone happy.<\/p>\n<p>I want to be the kind of person who acts with compassion, integrity, and curiosity.<br \/>\nThe kind of person who doesn\u2019t just react, but reflects.<br \/>\nThe kind of person who leaves things a little better than I found them.<\/p>\n<p>Even when that doesn\u2019t show up on a rubric.<br \/>\nEven when the impact isn\u2019t visible right away.<br \/>\nEven when no one notices.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe especially when no one notices.<\/p>\n<p>And honestly? That\u2019s the kind of moral compass I want to be modeling for kids.<\/p>\n<p>Because our country is more divided and unsettled than it\u2019s been in a long time. Fear and outrage are everywhere. Misinformation spreads fast. Nuance gets flattened.<\/p>\n<p>And in all of this, I\u2019ve seen that kindness, community care, and empathy aren&#8217;t just nice-to-haves\u2014they&#8217;re lifelines. Humans being good to one another, and considerate of one another\u2026this is what we still have, and what\u2019s holding us together.<\/p>\n<p>I see it every single day in on the streets in New York: the way folks go out of their way to help a tourist who is lost, and carry a stroller up a flight of steps in the subway for a mom who\u2019s on her own, and make friendly conversation with the barista who makes their coffee each morning. These tiny acts remind me I\u2019m not alone, the whole world has not gone crazy. These little things remind me that we do still have each other, that the human connection is more valuable perhaps now than ever, and that countless other people believe in this too.<\/p>\n<p>And that\u2019s why I wiped up the crumbs on the table at the airport: so the next person who came along, weary from their travels, could sit down at the table after me in a space that was clean and welcoming for them.<\/p>\n<p>And it doesn\u2019t matter to me if no one else does it. Some people won\u2019t, for a whole variety of understandable and not-so-understandable reasons. I\u2019m fine with that. Because it\u2019s not about me needing other people to wipe off their tables at the airport. I\u2019m focused on who I want to be and how I want to show up in the world. What am I contributing to the folks around me? Am I harming or helping? Am I making things better for others, or just for myself?<\/p>\n<p>Naturally, I am sometimes harming, sometimes thoughtless and careless, sometimes just focused on myself. This is okay, too, because I\u2019m human.<\/p>\n<p>My goal is to be aware of when those moments are happening\u2013rather than coasting through the day on autopilot\u2013and identifying what prevented me from showing up as the best version of myself.<\/p>\n<p>Was I too rushed to have time to wipe the table? On the phone and too distracted to realize I\u2019d left the table a mess? Was I annoyed, irritable, and just didn\u2019t feel like it?<\/p>\n<p>Knowing what circumstances make it harder for me to act from a place of integrity helps me make better choices in the future. I can leave earlier for the airport so I\u2019m not rushing, I can put away my phone and be present with my meal, I can make sure I have things like Airpods to help me stay comfortable in a noisy, chaotic environment so I can regulate my nervous system and be intentional with my behaviors.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s what I mean by showing up as the best version of myself, as much as I can. And that\u2019s what it looks like for me to follow my inner compass and choose how I want to act and react.<\/p>\n<p>I believe that each intentional choice can create a ripple effect on the people around us. I\u2019ve seen how one rude person can put me in a bad mood, so I\u2019m rude to others, and how one friendly person can make me laugh and help me bring a smile to someone else\u2019s face.<\/p>\n<p>And I know this is true in our schools, too. Students are watching us to see how we navigate the gray areas, and what we do in those little moments. Do we wipe the crumbs or leave them? They\u2019re watching how we respond when we\u2019re challenged, how we treat people who disagree with us, how we carry ourselves in moments of tension and stress.<\/p>\n<p>That doesn\u2019t mean we have to be perfect.<\/p>\n<p>But it <i>does<\/i> require a level of introspection and intentionality.<\/p>\n<p>So as you move through this summer\u2014resting, resetting, reflecting\u2014I invite you to notice the small things.<\/p>\n<p>Not the performative ones. Not the \u201ccheck this off your self-care list\u201d kind of things.<\/p>\n<p>The tiny, quiet moments that remind you of who you <i>are<\/i>.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\">The way you greet your neighbor or hold the door for a person behind you<\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\">The way you tend to your home, your relationships, your creative spark.<\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\">The way you choose kindness, even when you&#8217;re exhausted.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>And maybe take it one step further. Ask yourself:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><i>What kind of person do I want to be\u2014when no one\u2019s watching?<\/i><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><i>What kind of world do I want to help create?<\/i><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><i>What values feel true to me, even when they\u2019re inconvenient?<\/i><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>These are the moments that shape us. These are the quiet declarations we make about what we value, who we are, and who we\u2019re becoming.<\/p>\n<p>So when you\u2019re reading a news article or social media post and are tempted to conclude our society is falling apart and everyone\u2019s rude and selfish, remember the crumb story. Your choices don\u2019t have to be based on how other people behave. You don\u2019t have to mirror the unpleasantness others display.<\/p>\n<p>What kind of person do you like to be? How do you enjoy showing up in the world? What are your best traits and habits that feel really good to put forward as you move through your day?<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s your inner compass, your integrity, your highest self. Choosing to listen to and follow that intuition about the kind of person you like to be will ensure that you aren\u2019t easily swayed by other people\u2019s behaviors. Check in with yourself, act from your own integrity, and know that regardless of how (or if) other people respond, you will feel satisfied with how you showed up.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I wanted to share a small story\u2014just a quiet moment at an airport breakfast counter\u2014that brought me back to the kind of person I want to be. It\u2019s a simple action, one that no one asked for or expected. But it reminded me that our small choices matter\u2026 especially now. Because let\u2019s be honest: it\u2019s &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/truthforteachers.com\/truth-for-teachers-podcast\/following-your-inner-compass-when-you-cant-please-everyone\/\">Continued<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":153002,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","categories":[10,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-152844","podcasts","type-podcasts","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mindset-motivation","category-truth-for-teachers-podcast"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Truth For Teachers | Following your inner compass when you can\u2019t please everyone<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/truthforteachers.com\/truth-for-teachers-podcast\/following-your-inner-compass-when-you-cant-please-everyone\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Truth For Teachers | Following your inner compass when you can\u2019t please everyone\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I wanted to share a small story\u2014just a quiet moment at an airport breakfast counter\u2014that brought me back to the kind of person I want to be. 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